Man caves…can we just stop?

      4 Comments on Man caves…can we just stop?

WoodYou know why I hate this term? The implication is that men are not as in charge of the things in the house as women. It also lends an air of a “clubhouse” where women are not welcome.

When, why, and how did this crap start? I know men used to have a den. I have no idea what went into those rooms. I think they might have been where TVs were kept in the 50s or smoking jackets were worn. Now it seems to be a place akin to a sports bar. Hello? I do enjoy a good sports bar! Who wouldn’t want a room with a fully stocked bar in it?

The thing is that modern couples shouldn’t need this weird separation of rooms. Granted it might be OK to divide up the home evenly and assign someone in charge of them, but men are just as capable in the kitchen and laundry room as women. I’m sick and tired of the media and commercials pushing this outdated notion that men are completely lost when it comes to domestic stuff.

I am completely lost when it comes to domestic stuff. Where’s my woman cave? Wait…don’t answer that.

Personally, I freak out about decorating rooms. First of all, I’m cheap. Yes, DIY, second hand, I know. I forget about that stuff. But, second of all, I get overwhelmed. What is my style? Comfortable, I guess. I like colors. Can someone please just teach me where to start??

By the way, I’m kind of messy. Well, I guess disorganized is more like it. I have more important things to do, you know like tweeting, blogging and overcoming my addiction to Candy Crush Saga. But I do like to rearrange furniture every now and again. Can someone also show me how to get organized??

And if men are going to have rooms of their own, where is my room and my fancy name for it? Don’t we all need an oasis? Don’t we all need an escape? I feel like I’m quoting song lyrics now.

If you are single guy and you call your entire home a man cave, that’s fine. Back in the day, they called it a bachelor pad and it wasn’t necessarily tricked out to trick women into bed. That’s just in the movies. It was just male-centric.

You know what would be great? A TV show that shows you how to decorate on a budget, that isn’t a competition or in a hurry and covers the basics of how to begin. Didn’t HGTV used to have stuff like that?

4 thoughts on “Man caves…can we just stop?

  1. Sheepthemoon

    See, I have friends who have very controlling wives. When they bought their home, the husband had absolutely no say in the decor. None. And most men willingly give this up to prevent fights down the road. For men, it’s a no brainer.

    So men get a “man cave.” My grandfathers and great-uncles had their workshops, where they spent hours creating and fixing stuff, and having their own space that they had complete control over (the tool organization was immaculate). I think the workshop evolved into the “man cave.” For me, I’m building a workshop, but I also have my office/geekroom, where I can proudly display my geek side.

    As I think about it, I recall that a friend’s wife gave him a “man cave” that “he could do with as he chose,” and then when she didn’t like what he did, told him he had to do it over and do it in a certain way. So, I think it’s safe to say that in this matter, you are the exception to the rule. 🙂

    1. Amy Ruiz Post author

      It’s sad that I’m the exception to the rule. I don’t understand men who put up with controlling women. Then again, I don’t understand women who put up with controlling men, so there’s that. A workshop is a bit different since stuff gets built/created there. I guess it’s like those craft/sewing rooms some women have, but still it’s everyone’s home and everyone should feel comfortable in it.


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