Is the hook up culture killing off dating?

Is the hook up culture killing dating_This hook up culture thing is bunk. I’ve seen it coming up in the media lately, and it’s as though people have just started having casual sex. Um…no. Hooking up has been part of the culture for a long ass time. In a recent article, the author interviewed some men who I can only assume were frat boys. It doesn’t take a genius to know that frat boys and hook up culture (in the United States anyway) go hand in hand. It goes so far back in history that I wouldn’t be surprised if frat boys were even making a game of how many chicks they nailed in their shiny new Model T’s.

Let’s think about more recent history. Back in the 70s & 80s, there are no apps for guys to find gals to sleep with, yet they still found ways to hook up, keep score, and do other horrible shit to feed their egos, all the while publicly saying how much they wanted a pure and wholesome gal for a wife (because that’s what society said they should do/say/think).

The author also interviewed sorority girls. Personally, I thought the whole point of joining a sorority was to meet guys, so why those girls are even on dating sites is beyond me. But, as I read their stories, I felt bad for them. They put up with too much bullshit when they didn’t have to. Who says you HAVE to be on a date or hookup all the time? They just couldn’t see past their own fears of being alone.

Regardless, there are decent men out there who want a relationship. They just get drowned out by the noise coming from the crazies, sickos, and idiots who think sending an unsolicited dick pic is a great way to get laid. Dude, turn off the non-stop porn, go outside, and breathe some fresh air for a few hours. Also, if you sent an unknown gal a string of dirty talk in a chat message in the hopes of getting laid, you’ve lost your damn mind. Seek help now.

There is a time and place for dirty talk, and sending it to some unsuspecting random person on the internet is not it.

Here’s the thing, dating sucks because people are idiots. People do stupid things, mostly out of fear.

It’s like driving. You don’t remember the hundreds of people who are polite and kind. You just remember the idiot who treated you like shit and cut you off in traffic or wouldn’t let you merge when it was clearly your turn.

And of course, the media doesn’t help. Remember, they are in the business of making money, not being interesting or telling the facts. Fear sells. Which is why they try to sell you this hook up culture bullshit as being something new and caused by technology or shifts in society.

20 years ago, I remember feeling as though men just wanted to hook up instead of being in a relationship, and believe me, there was no Tinder or even Facebook for that matter. Hell, there wasn’t even text messages. You actually had to speak to someone on a phone without a screen.

Just remember, figure out your dating goal and stick to it.

If you just want to sleep with as many people as possible, fine, but be upfront and honest about it to any potential sexual partners. And don’t think that you can change anyone’s mind. Down that path lies heartache. If you really want a long-term relationship, let people know that too. You don’t have to be ready to get married on the second date, but let dates know you are not interested in a one night stand.

Whatever your dating goal is, stick to it and don’t let anyone make you feel bad about it or that it’s unachievable. It’s your life. Live it!

LEGO minfigures bump codes: Simpsons series 2

LEGO came out with yet another Simpsons minifigures set, so of course, my husband and I had to get each minifigure.

These bump codes are mostly for the first run. The only two we couldn’t find initially were Patty and Dr. Hibbert. They may be from a second or later production run. Below are the images along with hints on what to feel for to find each LEGO minifigure:

LEGO minfigures bump codes Simpsons

Bartman: Feel for his head/mask and slingshot. Smithers: feel for his hair and the Stacy doll box in his hand. Professor Frink: Feel for the beaker. He’s the only one with something beaker shaped. Homer on date night: This one is tricky because you can confuse him with Dr. Hibbert. The trick is to feel for the nose. That’s literally the only difference we could find to help distinguish between the two.

LEGO minifigures bump codes Simpsons


Milhouse as Fall Out Boy: He’s got a can, but you should feel for short legs too. The Comic Book Guy also has something can-like. Maggie & Santa’s Little Helper: Her hair is fairly distinctive, but of course, you should feel for the dog too. Marge on date night: Again, her hair will be the first thing you find, but also feel for her purse. Selma: Like her sisters, her hair is easy to spot, but to distinguish her from Patty, you’ll need to feel for the square eye test in her hand too.

LEGO Minifigures bump codes Simpsons

Edna Krabbapel: The mug and the square thing are a good combo to feel for, but check for her hair too. Comic Book Store Guy: He’s got a Slurpee thing in his hand, but feel for it carefully because you could confuse it for something else. Make sure it’s combined with a square thing. Martin Prince: The pointy thing on he hair is a good thing to feel for as well as the book. Hans Moleman: For some reason we kept finding tons of this guy. The letter in his hand is the easiest way to tell it’s him.


Dr. Hibbert: Again, he and Homer are really close, so be sure to feel for the difference in the nose. Patty: Her hair is amazingly huge. The bag will look slightly oddly shaped. Also feel for her purse. Lisa: Her hair is a dead giveaway, but could be confused with Maggie, so be sure to feel for Snowball II. Groundskeeper Willy: I found a ton of him too. The best way to make sure it’s him is to feel for the plunger.

Beauty Review: Jamberry Nails

Jamberry Nails Review

Getting your nails done is one luxury many women enjoy, of course, not everyone can get out to a nail salon on a regular basis. Plus, picking the same old colors gets boring to me.

When one of my friends asked me to try Jamberry, I was really excited. Have you looked at the totally cute designs they have available? So much fun!

Admittedly, I was a bit overwhelmed by the selection at first, mostly because I pretty much want all of them.  But I went through a process of selecting which ones would compliment not only the nail polishes I already have, but also each other.


As you can see, I combined four different wraps in two different ways. I also painted my nails and then used the Jamberry wrap as an accent. You are pretty much only limited to what you can imagine.

Applying the wraps was fairly easy. The instructions come with the wraps, but of course, you can always find them online. Angie, my friend who suggested I try the wraps, says that using Dawn dishwashing liquid to wash your hands before applying the wraps is a good way to help them stay adhered. It removes the oils on your nails pretty well.

Also, a good base coat will help the wraps stay put. In fact, mine stayed on for a good week, if not longer. Plus, I didn’t have to deal with chipped polish. The wraps are either on or off.

Summer Jamberry Wraps

Did I mention that you can use the Jamberry wraps on your toes too? Sandal season is here, so why not have some fun toenails?


They also have some nail care products to go with their wraps. I really liked the heater and the application kit. I’d say they both made the application process that much easier, which really wasn’t that much more difficult than painting your nails and a heck of a lot less messy.

You know what I’m looking forward to? Fun holiday themed wraps!

Full disclosure: I received a free set of Jamberry goodies for this review and I know Angie personally. However, all reviews/opinions expressed are my own and I only promote products which I use myself.

Why it’s OK to take a break from blogging

Take a break from bloggingIf you haven’t noticed, I haven’t been writing…in months. It’s not that I consciously decided to take a break from blogging. The need to write just wasn’t there. I was too busy trying to figure out my career and where the universe needed me. Something I realized, I really do like having a steady paycheck. So, when a great job was randomly sent to me, I took it. I’m so glad I did. I haven’t felt this relaxed in years. The people are great. The job is not overly stressful and the company seems pretty awesome.

Now, I can focus on my creativity instead of fretting where the next check might come from or if we’ll be able to pay bills. One good thing the freelancing stint taught me is that if I ever do find myself unemployed again, I know how to find some income until I can find another steady job.

As life settles into a comfortable pattern, I find the need to write coming back into my awareness. Randomly, I will pick up a pen and start writing the fevered thoughts in my head. I’ll pull up a blank Word doc and the ideas tumble onto the screen. I even bought a new computer, so I have even more inspiration to type on a keyboard and stare at a screen.

I’m not going to beat myself up because I didn’t blog every day or even regularly for the last 4 months. Clearly, I needed a break. No one is paying me to blog, so that’s the luxury I get…time off from the blog when life requires it. My belief is that if you are struggling to come up with the inspiration to blog, don’t try to fight it. Just take a break. Of course, I’m not talking about people who blog for a living, but if you need a break, take it. The inspiration will come back. It might be a slow burn, but you probably need a break like I did.

My Best Kept Secret for Stress Relief

RESCUE-Pastilles-NonChronStress is a normal part of everyday life. I just started a new job and trying to figure out which boxes need to be checked can be overwhelming. One of my go to methods is the simple to do list.

I have this problem where I think I have more to do than is really piled in front of me. Lists help give me perspective. Sometimes though, there is just a heck of a lot to do.

I’ve always heard of ways to handle stress after the stressful situation is over. Exercise, watching a funny movie, having a glass of wine…but, what can you do while you are in the middle of it all and wine is unavailable?

About 14 years ago, friend of mine introduced Bach’s Flower Remedies as a means of managing stress and anxiety. The best part? They’re homeopathic and all natural.

Now the Bach people have these RESCUE pastilles. I’ll admit, I thought they were going to be chalky like mints for some reason. But, they are more candy-like similar to lozenges, which was fine by me. And they are still homeopathic and all natural.


I liked that the RESCUE Pastilles are black currant flavored. It reminds me of a good glass of wine, which is also soothing in times of stress, but frowned upon at work. Plus, you can keep the tin in your purse for easy access so you can manage any stressful situation on the go.

When I feel the stress of work piling up in my brain, I just pop a RESCUE pastille and take a long slow deep breath. It helps my mind get clear and my perspective get back to normal and calm. RESCUE was developed by a doctor, so they are gentle, safe, and non-habit forming.

You can find RESCUE stress relief products in the US at CVS, Walgreens, Whole Foods, Sprouts and wherever you find natural products! Click here to get a coupon on one RESCUE product.

What do you to manage stress while in a stressful situation?

I was selected for this opportunity as a member of Clever Girls and the content and opinions expressed here are all my own.

Random Thoughts on Valentine’s Day

Random Thoughts on Valentine's DayThis will be only the third time in my life that I’ve had a real actual Valentine…and I’m 40. Needless to say, I’m not very good at the romance thing. My husband, on the other hand, is a romance ninja.

Single people, don’t feel bad. I know you will though. I hate the pain you feel when you see flowers being delivered to your office that aren’t for you. When you see those awful commercials for brown diamonds, and you get sad because there isn’t even anyone there to laugh with about the ugly things with you.

For 37 years I went through that crap. OK, maybe it’s more like 27. For the first 10 years of my life, I probably didn’t care about Valentine’s Day being a romantic holiday. It was more of a time for class parties, cupcakes, and candy hearts.

Now, I have the chance to wrap myself in pink hearts and red flowers…and I’m awful at it. Part of it is not wanting to spend money on stuff that isn’t essential to survival. Part of it is just not having any creative ideas for gifts. Yeah, I know. Boo freaking hoo. I’m not really complaining. It’s more of an intellectual enema. It’s funny to me that now that I finally have a Valentine, I’m totally stumped on romance.

Maybe it’s because to me, romance isn’t always giant gestures. Sure, those are great for holidays, but I’m better at the day to day romance. You know, the hand holding, the kisses on the cheek. I laugh at my husband’s jokes and silliness. I tell him how wonderful he is every day.

It seems to me though that pop culture is full of examples of how men can be romantic, but what about women? Do we just have to show up? Seems kind of lame.

Honestly, though I never really thought about what I can do to be romantic. I never really imagined a Valentine’s Day where I was doing something for a guy…get your mind out of the gutter. All I ever wanted was flowers and candy. My tastes are simple.

Anyway, I waited a long ass time for my Valentine to show up and he’s freaking awesome. So, don’t fret if you haven’t had a Valentine in a couple of years. It is what it is.

LEGO minifigures series 13 bump codes (part 2)

LEGO minifigures series 13 bump codesIt took a while, but I finally found the rest of the LEGO minifigures series 13 bump codes.  Initially we found everyone except the Hot Dog guy. It took a third trip to the LEGO store at the Mall of America to find him. We talked to one of the gals working there and it seems he’s pretty difficult to find. Below I’ve listed the remaining LEGO minifigures series 13 bump codes and tips on what to feel for in each mystery bag. Continue reading