>In a couple of weeks, a guy in my office is getting married. We started at the company within a few days of each other. That was 2 and a half years ago. At the time, we were both very single. A few weeks after our start dates, I remember him asking someone in the office about a girl in the industry and whether or not she was single. He may have known his bride to be at the time, but I’m pretty sure he wasn’t dating her when he asked that question. I’m curious to know how they met and started dating.
I’m still very single, but maybe in a year or so I could be the one getting married. Anything is possible right?
What is interesting is the reaction of the men in my office to his upcoming nuptials. It’s a psychological experiment. There are two generalized reactions. One is a hearty congratulations. My guess is that these are guys who are happily married or just happy at the moment.
The other reaction is usually a joke with a negative slant on being married…”Only a few more days of freedom for you!” or “Don’t do it!” Someone told him, “If you are going to get married, you should stash away $10,000 that she doesn’t know about and cannot touch.” I heard this and said, “Why would you marry someone who would cause you to do that?” He said, “People change, you never know what’s going to happen.” And you thought I was bitter!
>My 35th birthday is just under 2 weeks away and I’m not dealing with it well. In the past, my birthday has been a source of joy for me. Mostly, this was due to the receipt of presents, but I also enjoy any reason for a celebration.
Turning 30 wasn’t that big of a deal. I kind of looked forward to being less anxious about silly things and being more self-confident. The good thing is that I don’t feel 35. I feel about 25. It’s better than feeling 16 like I did until I was about 30.
Time just seems to be slipping by me unnoticed. I look up and 5 years have passed and I barely have anything to show for it. Old friends reconnect with me and start off with the usual, “So what have you been up to?” and I feel like my answer is totally lame, “I have a job.” Of course, I’m great at spreading that idea out over the course of a paragraph, but that about sums up the accomplishments of the last 15 years or so.
My loneliness rearing is it’s ugly head causing me to dread my birthday. That’s really the heart of the matter…no pun intended. Maybe I should stop trying to force the universe to adhere to my timetable (now, now, I want it now!) and just go with the flow.
On top of everything else, there is this feeling inside of me like I’m on the verge of doing something foolish, and I don’t really care about the consequences. Or I could get off my lazy ass and do something worthwhile instead of whining about it on a blog…But that would require effort on my part, as well some sort of motivation.