It must be hell inside your head*

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You want to know what PMS is like? It’s awful. One minute you’re pissed off because someone got on the elevator with you. (How dare they!) The next you are crying because no one loves you. (No one ever will.) Then you are laughing because your friend said something funny. (She’s hilarious!)

And all the while, all you want to do is hide from the world while the crazy stirs within. You can feel it lurking inside like a demon.

Add to that my usual insecurities and control issues and PMS is a hell of a thing.

Much like when Harry Potter encountered the Dementors, (shut up) the only thing that makes me feel sane again is chocolate.

I try my damnedest to control it. I try to bite my tongue. I try to count to ten and breathe before doing anything rash. I try to just hide from the world. I’m pretty good at hiding, but my work schedule doesn’t always allow for it.

What I would really like is a punching bag. Of course, a round of beating the hell out of a piece of leather will probably just make me cry in frustration anyway.

Sometimes I just need the emotional release of a good cry. I used to clean my house furiously when the depression and anxiety of PMS would set in. It always ended with me bawling my eyes out on my bed, but at least I burned a few extra calories first!

*Quote from Big Bang Theory

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