Some assembly required…in the bedroom

Putting together furniture is a lot like having sex.

Maybe I haven’t had very good sex, which I’m fairly certain has been the case. But when you are putting together a piece of furniture, you have to be in awkward positions for extended periods of time. It’s probably only five minutes, but it feels like five hours.

You always seem to find yourself rolling around on the ground.

Also, things usually go better if you follow the pictures in the book. If you try to wing it, you could hurt yourself. The instruction manual always seems confusing, but looks easy and fun.

Something, inevitably will accidentally be put in the wrong hole.

If you try to push yourself, you will probably pull something.

Lift with your legs, not with your back.

It’s always more fun when you have a friend, but you can go it alone if you must to get the job done.

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