I’m sorry, what? Things about women I don’t understand.

For those of you who might not have a clue, I am a woman.  However, there are things women do that even I don’t understand.  Maybe something fundamentally is wrong with me…or maybe I’m just a new form of evolved species, like one of the X-Men, except my mutation is common sense.  At least that’s what I’m going to tell myself when I feel like I’m out of step with the rest of my sex.

  1. Making a man buy feminine products.  Unless I am bedridden, there is no way I’m going to ask any male to purchase maxi pads for me.  I won’t even ask a woman to do that for me.  I’m a grown up.  I can keep track of my own supplies and guess what, there’s an app that will let me know when my time of the month is imminent, so I can plan accordingly.  Also, I don’t want to burden someone with that task.  Most women are particular about the products they use and don’t want to rely on someone else for their comfort…or is that just me?
  2. Dinner whores.  I saw someone use this phrase on Twitter and I was baffled.  No self respecting woman is going to use a guy just to get a free dinner.  The possibility of doing this as a means of survival has never crossed my mind.  I have a job. I can pay for my own dinner.  Dates are to figure out if I want to be in a relationship with a guy not to get a free meal.  What the hell is wrong with those women?  It’s not 1959 and our options for work are limited.  Grow the hell up and deal with your daddy issues.
  3. Going shopping with your boyfriend.  What is this? Some kind of control issue?  Maybe it’s because I’ve never been in a relationship long enough to consider forcing a guy into a mall while I look for a new dress  or maybe it’s because I’d rather shop alone anyway, but why do this?  Again, am I just missing that gene? Here, hold my purse while I figure this out.

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