>That’s What Halloween is All About

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Most people like the idea of dressing up in a costume.  They get to flex their creativity while bending the rules of good taste, gender, or sexuality. Sometimes it’s just as a means to win a prize, but usually it’s to entertain and get attention. 

For me, the costume thing was always just a means to end.  A sweet, delicious candy end.  Yes, I enjoy the festival atmosphere at a Halloween party and “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown” is my second favorite holiday special of all time. But honestly, I’m in it for the candy. 

The best part of trick or treating? Coming home to peruse the candy booty.  I remember separating the candy into various piles: Favorites, Tradable, but Edible, Give Away, and Total Crap.  There usually wasn’t much in the Total Crap pile.  Once in a while I would get a random mystery candy or some Dum-Dum Lollipops, but I tried like hell to trade the stuff I didn’t want with my sister, cousins or friends.

Just in case you want further definition as to my specific tastes, below is a sampling of my sorting:

  • Favorites: Snickers, Twix, Milky Way, Nestle, Mr. Goodbar, Hershey’s, almost any chocolate mini-candy bar
  • Tradable, but Edible: Three Musketeers, Skittles, Starburst, Charleston Chew
  • Give Away: Jolly Ranchers, Sugar Babies, Sugar Daddy, any type of non-chocolate, hard fruity candy
  • Total Crap: Gum, Dum-Dums, Idaho Spud, Chunky

Of course, I don’t go trick or treating anymore since I can buy as much candy as my heart desires, but I do get to partake of the leftovers the parents in my office bring in on November 1 in an effort to prevent their children from over-indulging in sugar.

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