Online Dating Chronicles: What is normal?

At one point, not long ago in our history, meeting people via a dating site was considered to be weird. OK, maybe for some people (most people) it still is weird. Meeting people in a bar was taboo…back in the 50s…I think.

What I’m trying to say is that just because a method of meeting people who are potential mates is considered odd, doesn’t mean that it’s a bad way to meet people. One day it could be socially acceptable.

My problem is that I have a hard time with traditional methods. People meet at work. Everyone at my work is married or female. People meet during their hobbies. I write. I don’t have to interact with anyone to do it…in fact, writing is best done alone.

So, who’s to say how people should find each other? Getting set up by friends? Singles events? Car accident? Has that worked for anyone? It just seems to be this random occurrence. Some people meet in bars. I guess. Some people meet online. This I have hard evidence to back, so I can say that. People in college meet in class. One of my friends gets talked up on in bars all the time. Of course, they rarely turn into dates for her. Maybe I’m jinxing her.

I’m trying to stop thinking that I’ve got some sort of spinster disease that single friends of mine catch. It’s stupid to think that I have that much power and influence over someone’s life. I can barely control my own life.

Lately, I’ve just been thinking about how to change my mind. I’m tired of this horrible lonely feeling in my soul. It’s less than it used to be. It helps that I’ve been getting male attention from a distance. Granted, it’s from someone I’ve never met in real life, but it feels pretty real to me. I try not to analyze it and just enjoy the moment. The problem is that I need physical contact, especially from a man. I crave it. I need to be touched. I am rarely touched by anyone. Is that the saddest thing you’ve heard? Probably not, but it’s true. Partially, it’s because I don’t like being touched by people I don’t know, they might do me harm, partially it’s just because I’m single. Who is going to touch me on a regular basis? No one.

Like George Costanza, I can survive without being touched by the opposite sex for an epic amount of time. A month? Nothing. Get back to me when you’ve hit the decade level and then we’ll compare pathetic notes. OK, it’s only been 3 months since a man last touched me, but I didn’t enjoy it all that much.  I’ve been in the decade club before and it sucks.

I could even go for months without being touched if I knew there was a very high probability of it at a scheduled point in the future. It’s the not having something to look forward to, it’s the uncertainty that kills me.

Yes, the man is supposed to meet me in real life at a predetermined time in the future, but it’s not set in stone, as far as I know.  I have it set in my calendar, but I’m skittish.  Maybe he’ll change his mind.  Maybe he’s just as scared as I am.  Maybe he doesn’t care.  Maybe he does.  See what I mean about over-analyzing? Yes, I know it’s probably stupid to meet a complete stranger this way.  Well, he’s not a complete stranger.  I’ve interacted with him more than the 18 guys I’ve gone out with on real dates over the past two years.  But there is inherent risk in everything right?  If you don’t take a chance, how will you ever know?

2 thoughts on “Online Dating Chronicles: What is normal?

  1. MsChick74 Post author

    Oh yes, Frankie. I have read your riveting story. 🙂 I think about it from time to time and marvel at how the universe moves us around. Normal is boring. I try to avoid boring if at all possible. Thanks for the lovely comment!

    Reply

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