Is the hook up culture killing off dating?

Is the hook up culture killing dating_This hook up culture thing is bunk. I’ve seen it coming up in the media lately, and it’s as though people have just started having casual sex. Um…no. Hooking up has been part of the culture for a long ass time. In a recent article, the author interviewed some men who I can only assume were frat boys. It doesn’t take a genius to know that frat boys and hook up culture (in the United States anyway) go hand in hand. It goes so far back in history that I wouldn’t be surprised if frat boys were even making a game of how many chicks they nailed in their shiny new Model T’s.

Let’s think about more recent history. Back in the 70s & 80s, there are no apps for guys to find gals to sleep with, yet they still found ways to hook up, keep score, and do other horrible shit to feed their egos, all the while publicly saying how much they wanted a pure and wholesome gal for a wife (because that’s what society said they should do/say/think).

The author also interviewed sorority girls. Personally, I thought the whole point of joining a sorority was to meet guys, so why those girls are even on dating sites is beyond me. But, as I read their stories, I felt bad for them. They put up with too much bullshit when they didn’t have to. Who says you HAVE to be on a date or hookup all the time? They just couldn’t see past their own fears of being alone.

Regardless, there are decent men out there who want a relationship. They just get drowned out by the noise coming from the crazies, sickos, and idiots who think sending an unsolicited dick pic is a great way to get laid. Dude, turn off the non-stop porn, go outside, and breathe some fresh air for a few hours. Also, if you sent an unknown gal a string of dirty talk in a chat message in the hopes of getting laid, you’ve lost your damn mind. Seek help now.

There is a time and place for dirty talk, and sending it to some unsuspecting random person on the internet is not it.

Here’s the thing, dating sucks because people are idiots. People do stupid things, mostly out of fear.

It’s like driving. You don’t remember the hundreds of people who are polite and kind. You just remember the idiot who treated you like shit and cut you off in traffic or wouldn’t let you merge when it was clearly your turn.

And of course, the media doesn’t help. Remember, they are in the business of making money, not being interesting or telling the facts. Fear sells. Which is why they try to sell you this hook up culture bullshit as being something new and caused by technology or shifts in society.

20 years ago, I remember feeling as though men just wanted to hook up instead of being in a relationship, and believe me, there was no Tinder or even Facebook for that matter. Hell, there wasn’t even text messages. You actually had to speak to someone on a phone without a screen.

Just remember, figure out your dating goal and stick to it.

If you just want to sleep with as many people as possible, fine, but be upfront and honest about it to any potential sexual partners. And don’t think that you can change anyone’s mind. Down that path lies heartache. If you really want a long-term relationship, let people know that too. You don’t have to be ready to get married on the second date, but let dates know you are not interested in a one night stand.

Whatever your dating goal is, stick to it and don’t let anyone make you feel bad about it or that it’s unachievable. It’s your life. Live it!

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